Love, Steven

Art, Poetry

The feeling of being hurt by the first person you allowed to love you, and refusing to allow yourself to be loved ever again after.

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Sickness

Art, Poetry

Does whiteness

Get as sick

As i—

Ovehearing their negligence

Of black voice

As i do?

If not,

Why bother

Speaking?

Foresight

Non-Fiction, Poetry

By: Steven Underwood

Mirror,Mirror, cast upon me

Tell me anything I don’t see in the dark.
A bog of memberance.

Plagues inside me.

Scars so wide and deep within.

Tumoured sorrows,

Why was I cursed to live?

I drown in marshes

Swallow sadness, dirt and grime

I taste tomorrow,

I recoil,

Then, I hope you’ll save today.
Mirror,

Broke inside me,

Is this the reflection I paid to see?
Our hearts go forward,

Placed on scaling,

I wonder whose a true strength goes on.

Yours is tempered,

Sheltered from love,

But too many holes

And punctured plights .

Mine is golden,

Swelled too large and —

Surely it can no longer beat.
Mirror, Mirror —

Locked inside me,

Keep the light off of me,

My shame is that i fear always,

A lonely, cold destiny.

Mirror, mirror —

Please come for me.

I cant live on,

Please watch from here on,

Keep these shadows off of–

Save me from the world to be.

Im a saddened sun,

Whose lost intensity.

Voicemails to Heaven.

Poetry

Hey Dad, it’s me,

I hope you see

I’m really doing fine.

School is hard,

But I can make it far

as long as you look over me.

 

I do my best,

puff out my chest,

but I still hear your voice.

Sometimes it’s tough

Life gets so rough,

I just want you back.

 

You taught me how to swim up stream

How to stand, be seen

and to always love myself

and I don’t know if you heard:

but I do all so very well.

 

Make sure you visit your daughters,

You know we love them the best

 

Visit Danine’s Dreams,

Her potential will be unmatched

 

And they say I look like my father,

and I wish it was true.

God must’ve always knew

I would need you.

 

I pray every day,

From June through May

even if you can’t hear me.

 

I just want you to know,

I love you so,

even if the words can’t be.

 

I promised I’d try, every day

so I can’t delay,

but please forgive me…

I just couldn’t see

you not in your face.

 

 

 

Some days I wake and

cry free the waters,

because I know you won’t be

there to see me make you proud

and do so much for me.

 

Please know I’m real,

You know I can’t conceal

all the Truths in my face.

 

I’m sorry I couldn’t see your grave.

Betrayal at your side

I know you could hear at your bed

The moment I saw your eyes,

I knew you’d fight all your might,

but I couldn’t put you through

all the pain and bite

just so in case,

I could see your face.

 

The Guilt may take my soul,

but I’ll pay it whole.

 

Every price must be met.

 

As far as it’s me,

We’ll see,

The world will spin on more.

Just sweeten my sisters,

Your shadows must see,

Your glow in the eyes of

their loved men worthy.

 

Daddy, I love you so,

but I have to go

so receive these words as they stay.

 

And as I leave this phone,

And the agony dies

Just know,

I’ve learned how not to cry.

Resent

Non-Fiction, Poetry

By Steven Underwood

 

Numb like the first time I said I hate you,

That’s what I am,

I worshipped the wrong words we shared;

I bent the knee on brown rice and glass

And acknowledged the kinship like

The pupper lapping sweetened water from a bowl.

Neglect my sorrows once, and I will come

Neglect my tears twice, and I follow

Neglect my heart thrice, cross it, and I will die

I hope those days are over

I pray that solace into my open palms

My bare lap

And my solemn dreams.

Then maybe I can finally feel